Too poetic? So sue me.
A an old friend of mine whom I haven't had much opportunity to hang out with for a long time wrote me an email recently.
He wrote:
“What’s important in your life?” –
Family … specifically my wife and children.
Goodness … I’m a confused individual right now. I make no bones about that. But the one thing I’m sure of is that I am FOR Goodness, whatever the hell that is. My stomach turns at Evil: torture, rape, child molestation, abuse, genocide. And my spirit soars when I see Goodness done.
Honesty … After living a double-life for so long, I believe in, and do my best to practice, honest communication… even when it is hard and painful, I prefer to be open and honest. I’d rather you spit on me and tell me that you hate me than to act “civil” to my face and dislike me in your heart.
Genuine Friendship … I’m sick of play friends: people who are friends because they are ‘supposed’ to be your friend. I love to find friends who I genuinely enjoy hanging out with and they genuinely enjoy who I am, ya know? People who are strong enough to have an opinion about something…. People who live life in such a way that they are willing to be vulnerable and who are not scared when I am vulnerable. I love to cry, and to laugh, and to pray, and to ache, with other men who desire the same.
THAT is living … to me, anyway.
"What are your hopes as a father?” –
I hope my children grow up knowing that they are loved. I hope that we have a strong relationship and that I effectively demonstrate how important and valuable they are to me. I hope they grow up confident enough to be 100% who they are, and that they be humble enough to admit their weaknesses, frailty, and failures. I hope they learn from me what it means to love … what it means to think and ponder the important things in life … and what it means to live with integrity.
“What are your hopes as a husband?” -
I hope that somehow, despite how tremendously different we are as individuals, that I find ways to encourage and strengthen my wife. I hope that my dark burdens to not crush her carefree and wonderfully light spirit. I hope that I live my life in such a way that causes her to respect me, to consider me a friend and companion, and to trust me. I hope to challenge her to live life to its fullest: to enjoy the heights, and to endure the dark depths. I hope that she grows as a woman, as a human being, as a spiritual woman. I hope that the things that I am bound to do that damage my wife, from silly miscommunications to angry words, do not cause permanent damage to our marriage. I hope that my wife knows by the way I live my life that I love her completely and forever.
“What are your hopes for me?” –
What I hope for you, I hope for all that I love and for myself. I hope that you find happiness and companionship in life. I hope that you live your life alongside genuine friends and that you search for and discover a soul-mate lover to have and hold forever. I hope that you live life with gusto… that you do not waste your life on trivial things, but that you pursue Goodness and Truth and Love. I hope that you risk. I hope that you get back up when you fall. I hope that you endure hard times. I hope that you trust… again. I hope that you step out of your comfort zone. I hope that you never give up on dreams. I hope that you never settle for a hum-drum life … that you seek out adventure in all that you do. I hope that you forgive. I hope that you stand up and do good when you see Evil. I hope that you are willing to lose all for that which is Right and Noble and Good.
Too poetic? Sue me.
He wrote:
"what's up brother... yesterday sitting at the hard rock drinking a bloody mary... thinking about whats important in my life... and the people that are important and close to me... dude... i have an idea of what's important to you... but i have never asked... dude... what's important in your life?... what are your hopes as a father?... a husband?... tell me because i want to know... i'm sitting here thinking about you and your family... want to tell you that you, janice, and your kids are important in my life... and somehow i want to be more involved in your lives even though i'm here in the east coast... love you guys... also... tell me what are your hopes for me?..."What a good friend he is! Read my response here...Here is what I wrote in response:
“What’s important in your life?” –
Family … specifically my wife and children.
Goodness … I’m a confused individual right now. I make no bones about that. But the one thing I’m sure of is that I am FOR Goodness, whatever the hell that is. My stomach turns at Evil: torture, rape, child molestation, abuse, genocide. And my spirit soars when I see Goodness done.
Honesty … After living a double-life for so long, I believe in, and do my best to practice, honest communication… even when it is hard and painful, I prefer to be open and honest. I’d rather you spit on me and tell me that you hate me than to act “civil” to my face and dislike me in your heart.
Genuine Friendship … I’m sick of play friends: people who are friends because they are ‘supposed’ to be your friend. I love to find friends who I genuinely enjoy hanging out with and they genuinely enjoy who I am, ya know? People who are strong enough to have an opinion about something…. People who live life in such a way that they are willing to be vulnerable and who are not scared when I am vulnerable. I love to cry, and to laugh, and to pray, and to ache, with other men who desire the same.
THAT is living … to me, anyway.
"What are your hopes as a father?” –
I hope my children grow up knowing that they are loved. I hope that we have a strong relationship and that I effectively demonstrate how important and valuable they are to me. I hope they grow up confident enough to be 100% who they are, and that they be humble enough to admit their weaknesses, frailty, and failures. I hope they learn from me what it means to love … what it means to think and ponder the important things in life … and what it means to live with integrity.
“What are your hopes as a husband?” -
I hope that somehow, despite how tremendously different we are as individuals, that I find ways to encourage and strengthen my wife. I hope that my dark burdens to not crush her carefree and wonderfully light spirit. I hope that I live my life in such a way that causes her to respect me, to consider me a friend and companion, and to trust me. I hope to challenge her to live life to its fullest: to enjoy the heights, and to endure the dark depths. I hope that she grows as a woman, as a human being, as a spiritual woman. I hope that the things that I am bound to do that damage my wife, from silly miscommunications to angry words, do not cause permanent damage to our marriage. I hope that my wife knows by the way I live my life that I love her completely and forever.
“What are your hopes for me?” –
What I hope for you, I hope for all that I love and for myself. I hope that you find happiness and companionship in life. I hope that you live your life alongside genuine friends and that you search for and discover a soul-mate lover to have and hold forever. I hope that you live life with gusto… that you do not waste your life on trivial things, but that you pursue Goodness and Truth and Love. I hope that you risk. I hope that you get back up when you fall. I hope that you endure hard times. I hope that you trust… again. I hope that you step out of your comfort zone. I hope that you never give up on dreams. I hope that you never settle for a hum-drum life … that you seek out adventure in all that you do. I hope that you forgive. I hope that you stand up and do good when you see Evil. I hope that you are willing to lose all for that which is Right and Noble and Good.
Too poetic? Sue me.
posted by Miroslav at 12:47 PM
5 Comments:
Miroslav.
I love you and admire you so very much.
I think your friend on the east coast is a good one; I wish he were closer geographically. He is the type of friend I pray God brings alongside you in your daily life soon.
I am grateful that you are my son.
Momma
Oh, my...I hope the unk and I become all that to each other as well!....and to you, so that you don't get sick of us :- {
Miroslav,
did I ever tell you that you make me cry? Wow,your honest communication and care is so refreshing. I hope that we could all learn to value those in our lives like you are. I am sure that living it out is the hard part, but if we don't know what it should look like we certainly can't live it. I heard an amazing message last week on integrity and it was from such a different angle. I believe that you are living a life with integrity because you are honest with yourself and with others. That is definiely where integrity starts for us frail human beings, not perfection but honesty and humility when we fail and the willingness to admit it and be humbled.
Where can I serve my papers!
Momma,
Too kind... but I suppose you are entitled to post stuff like this since you ARE my mom and all. :)
Auntie Lamb,
Sick of y'all? Never.
Woman of Faith,
I make you cry? Is that a good thing? :)
Thank you for you kind words about how I'm trying to live my life. As Chester Cheetah says, "It ain't easy bein' Cheesy."
Anon,
I'll tell you where you can serve your papers.... !
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