"WHAT A WOMAN!!"

I wish I had a better grasp of the English language. Or perhaps even if I did, words would fail me. Though I know my efforts will not fully capture the scope or depth, I must try.

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Read about my wonderful gal!

Last night, my wife and I walked together, hand in hand, through one long night in this terribly tragic and mysteriously joyful thing called life. We talked, and laughed, and cried together. It was one of those rare and precious moments when we were naked in spirit together and found another level of love to share as deep as could be imagined or hoped for. We held one another close while questioning everything about ourselves and one another. It was one of those talks that last until 2am... with the heights of the conversation coming in the dark, in bed... while half-asleep. At times we were ashamed, at other times proud of what we found inside ourselves. We were tempted to blame one another for hurts, but ultimately found that path to be foolishness. We returned to our senses and once again embraced our shared humanity that we are exploring and experiencing together during this strange new season of life.

Interrupting our talk was the sound of our precious daughter who has been having a hard time sleeping this week. But as she cried, and my dear wife would rise to tend to her, I smiled. Yes, a broad smile spread across my face as I hear the sound of my wife comforting my little girl. How rich is my life! And then my wife would return to bed, ready again to engage in this struggle for her husband's sanity and peace.

Though the night was not easy nor always pleasant. It was. And it was real. It brings to mind a night spent in a horrible storm. Stuck in a tent for safety, you huddle together for warmth and security. Though you toss and turn with discomfort, you finally find warmth and peace right there in the midst of it all and fall asleep. And in the morning, you rise to find that you have endured the storm together, and a bond was formed through it all. Yes, that is how I feel this morning as I see the clear blue skies and as I breathe the crisp cool air.

As last night wore on, the drama and torment of the issues at hand vanished in the presence of our love and dedication to one another. The torturous grip of pain and confusion was broken by the clarity of my wife's wonderful companionship and beauty. We found ourselves vulnerable before one another... and we enjoyed it.

And that is where my entry must stop, for I do not kiss and tell. ; )

"WHAT A WOMAN!!" I scream at the top of my lungs.

Today I read the lyrics to a song I've never heard. It reminds me of my love, my wife. In the midst of the storm of life, I've found a soul-mate, a friend, a companion and am learning to be one to her as well:

Bowl of Oranges, by Bright Eyes

The rain it started tappin'
On the window near my bed
There was a loophole in my dreamin'
So I got out of it
And to my surprise my eyes were wide and already open
Just my nightstand and my dresser
Where those nightmares had just been

So I dressed myself and left then
Out into the gray streets
But everything seemed different
And completely new to me
The sky the trees, houses, buildings, even my own body
And each person I encountered
I couldn't wait to meet

And I came upon a doctor
Who appeared in quite poor health
I said there's nothing that I can do for you you can't do for yourself
He said oh yes you can, just hold my hand, I think that that would help
So I sat with him awhile
Then I asked him how he felt

He said I think I'm cured
No, in fact, I'm sure of it
Thank you, stranger
For your therapeutic smile

So that's how I learned the lesson
That everyone's alone
And your eyes must do some raining
If you're ever gonna grow
And when crying don't help
You can't compose yourself
It's best to compose a poem
An honest verse of longing
Or a simple song of hope

That's why I'm singing baby don't worry
'Cause now I got your back
And every time you feel like crying
I'm gonna try and make you laugh
And if I can't
If it just hurts too bad
Then we'll wait for it to pass
And I will keep you company for those days so long and black

And we'll keep working on the problem
We know we'll never solve
Of love's uneven remainders
Our lives are fractions of a whole
But if the world could remain within a frame
Like a painting on a wall
Then I think we'd see the beauty then
We'd stand staring in awe

At our still lives posed
Like a bowl of oranges
Like a story told
By the fault-lines and the soil